Love me, that's all I ask of you

Why does age matter?

Once a upon a time I lived in a world where age didn’t matter…

Why does age matter after a certain point?  Why do people feel the need to judge two people who are truly in love?  Why is it okay for people to poke holes in something that is real just because they don’t understand it? 

I am 19 years old, but wiser then the years I have lived.  The man I love is 27.  That is about a 7 year difference, which seems a lot bigger right now then it really is.  But think about different couples in your life or that you have heard of…I know couples that are 10, 12, and 13 years apart. If I were 27, he would be 34.  Does that seem weird to anyone? I doubt it. I understand the completely inappropriate relationships of 13 year olds and 30 year old. Or teachers and student. I understand when a certain type of relationship is not appropriate or accepted. I truly do.  But my relationship with this man is not one of those relationships.

I am so sick of hearing “You are so young.” or “Are you sure you really know what love is?” I understand how old I am, I have lived every single day of those 19 years.  And as for knowing about truly knowing if I am in love, what about you? How do you define love? Are you sure you have ever really been in love? Someone PLEASE give me a definition that everyone can agree on without wanting to add their own phrases and points on to it.  Then I want someone to look me in the eye and tell me why my love is wrong.  Without using age as your argument, please tell me why loving this man is wrong. He doesn’t hit me, he doesn’t blame me, he doesn’t yell at me, and he doesn’t threaten me.  He supports where I want to go with my life, he loves me for who I am, not for who he wants me to be.  He talks to me with openness and honesty, and he truly listens to what I am saying. He is my best friend.  Tell me why a love like this is not okay? Give me valid points that don’t involve the age card and I will listen.  But if your only argument for me is that I am young and I don’t know what I want I am going to tell you that you have no idea what I have been through in my life, and that just because I am young, it does not mean that I am naive and stupid to what I am putting all of my love into.

And family, isn’t family supposed to want what makes you happiest? I know that they will have their opinions, thought and advise about what you are doing and how you are going about it.  But in the end, shouldn’t they want what’s best for you and what makes you happy?? Aren’t we supposed to make our own choice as we grow up, and aren’t we supposed to make our own mistakes? That is all I am trying to do. All I am trying to do is follow my heart, chase what makes me happy, and learn from the decisions I make. 

I love him. With everything I have in me.  I have tried pretending I didn’t because he is my best friend and because of the age card that has been pulled by every one I know.  He makes me so unbelievably happy. He listens to what I say and talks to me honestly.  He doesn’t ask me to change who I am just because there is something we disagree on.  He doesn’t play stupid mind games.  He makes me laugh. He makes me think.  He pushes me to be best I can be.  He calls me out on my bullshit.  He deals with my emotions and mood swings.  And so much more.  I am able to be 100% myself around him with no worries of being judged.  I feel so safe in his arms. He knows more about me then almost anyone in my life.  Losing him would be like taking my heart from my chest and making sure I never felt anything else for the rest of my life.  I cannot picture my life without him. 

In ending, these are my thoughts….follow your heart and let it fall in love on it’s own, you cannot force something that is not there.  Be open to love, let it fill every last inch of you. Take others advise, but remember that your decision are what is going to make you happy in the end.  Never let anything get in the way of true love.  If you love someone, truly love them, then fight like hell because every moment, tear, kiss, look and memory you gain will be worth so much more than anything else. Stand by him/her, through it all.  Remember that it is okay to be vulnerable.  And above all else, remember that true love is the closest thing we have to magic, so hold it close and cherish it for all it is worth.

“One might say that it is ridiculous to implore others to fall in love—one either falls in love or one does not, it is not a choice that can be made consciously. Emotions do not follow the instructions of the rational mind. But the environment in which we must live out our lives has a great influence on our emotions, and we can make rational decisions that will affect this environment. It should be possible to work to change an environment that is hostile to love into an environment that will encourage it. Our task must be to engineer our world so that it is a world in which people can and do fall in love, and thus to reconstitute human beings so that we will be ready for the “revolution” spoken of in these pages—so that we will be able to find meaning and happiness in our lives.”